Twenty days of my life – destroyed by allergies
I slept all day again. Finally got out of bed and am somewhat dazed.
It feels something like what “healthy” people feel when they have a really bad cold. A head full of clouds and heavy lungs.
I’m unfocused and have to figure out how I’m going to manage to write the work that is due tomorrow.
The pollen count is a dangerous 9.4. I figure people who have no allergies to pollen are probably feeling this one.
Earlier this pollen season, I switched over and became nocturnal – for self preservation. I can get some work done in the wee hours of the morning before the sun comes up and then sleep through the thickest part of the pollen that spews by day.
Everything hurts.
As I write this, I’m hoping to gather enough energy so I can take a shower.
Yesterday, for no good reason, I decided to go outside.
There are times when I just want to pretend I’m “normal” – and can go outside for a little while and do simple things like everyone else.
My husband and I went for a little walk to a nearby restaurant that has a PokéStop – which we have done several times before.
My eyes are itching and I’m wheezing.
Too overloaded with pollen to think clearly.
My neighbors just had a screaming fight outside for all to hear, which typically would set off my PTSD.
I am not ok.
The cumulative effect of being exposed to too much pollen, for so many days, is taking its toll.
We have lived through 59 days in 2017 – and 16 of mine have been utterly ruined due to bad allergies that I can’t do much of anything about.
Some of the other days were very difficult due to my rheumatoid arthritis or fibromyalgia, or accidental allergen exposure.
This body was not meant to live on this planet.
